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ღ Saturday, April 30, 2005

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went to celebrate my god grandma bdae. went for dim sum buffet. ate alot. i finally ate the tang bao. lol. bao inside got soup de. yummy!!! the dessert also nice sago mango dunno wad wif pamelo. hehe. so long nv eat good food le. ^^ yada! later going out eat again.

*i wish everyday is a happy day*

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6:02 PM

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guess wad? my wish dun come true at all. she's here everyday. but much better la. cuz no sick. den not so angry with everything. but still command ppl and still talk behind ppl back. as long not say me let me hear can liao. or my frens. today is a very busy day. dash in and out. i run couple of time today. serve endless bedpan. my side, hui hui side. cuz they all went to break together. omg. we so short handed. plus today no AN i'm on my own. take parameter myself. no one remind me. hrly also. do i/o chart also. first time do alone sia. den admission also tried my best. i even taught hui hui how to give nebulizer ventolin. she helped me do NGT feeding. i had totally no confident in dat. dunno y sia. din do ani dressing today. night no dressing de. yawn. keep bedpan and urinal lo. sianz. lol. yesterday i alot of things too. but i was like damn blur. keep chart on the wrong clinical chart. den did interview with my case study. peaceful day rather.

today is so dramatic. patient lost wallet. 4 police came. 4 student nurses in the 4 patients room dat time with 1 lecturer doing dressing for 1 patient. no one came in and the wallet is lost? the patient went out came back found it missing. well... cun give much comment la....

*i wish i got more money to spend feel dat i have alot of things need to buy*

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12:46 AM

ღ Wednesday, April 27, 2005

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juz finish watching AIR. finish liao den i huh??? wad happen to yukito san? where can liddat jiu end de? i wan a very detail ending. T.T but overall it's a nice show la. juz confuse abt some part nia. thx lynn for ur recommendation. ^^

wa... bad day sia. juz simply becuz i got a bad staff nurse today. and the same old lecturer. -.- the staff nurse attitude realli very bad. not appreciative at all. treat me like maid or some lowly person. she din say plz to ask me help her do things. nv say plz nvm rite? but she's ordering me around lo. eg: 'go do 27 admission NOW!' and 'go take off 30's IV plug NOW!' and 'y are u standing dere?!? go outside and help LA!!' kaoz. call me maid sua la. damn rude lo. other staff are alot better den her. no manners how to be a nurse? she self claimed she last time was a kindergarten teacher. i bet all the kids hate her. den she self claim the principal dun bear to let her go. and the kids love her. -.- wth. also she's double face. but she show me single face onli. cuz she dun bother to be kind to me. thinking i cannot provide her much help. i know she's sick. so i already help doing alot of things. answering call bell dat i'm not in charge. doing things i dun need to do. doing things i dunno how to do. and she juz dun appreciate it. still use those face dat say 'i dun like u. go away' to me. kaoz. i caught her 2 times talking bad things abt us student. first time i was charting the clinical chart. she stood a distance away. not aware dat i'm dere. the clerk ask her sometime den she say 'i dunno la. this admission done by a STUDENT de lo.' machiam like if do wrong not her prob and also i cfm will do wrongly one lo. she asked me do de. if she dun trust me might as well dun ask me do rite? wth. when she say dat i turn and look at her. den her face is like 'uh oh' when she saw me. as well as seeing the admission signature part is not my name. dat's rite. it's done by her precious AN not me. i onli done part 1 cuz i not sure how to do. at least i asked. i look at her till she turn her head away. hello i dunno how to do i can ask one rite? idiot. den another time she talk bad abt a yr 3 student. dat yr 3 student is so capable lo. she is like a staff nurse already. doing so well. this SN hor think dat no one can do better den her. wa liew. and noe wad?? infront of the yr 3 she is all so nice. saying thanks and smiling. behind her say as if she dunno how to do anithing liddat. and i also wad this SN do. 2 blood transfusion she also complain too much work. hypocount yr 3 do. dressing i do. send patient AN do. wad she do?? order ppl around. hui hui heard her talking behind ppl during break. how can u treat someone so rude when u are trying to get their help? i am so pissed off by her. phew. done complaining. feel so much better.

when passing report at the end of the shift. i was helping one old lady. she was very agitated and agressive. try to hold her done and talking to her. so i'm busy rite? also i dun need to be there during passing report. den when she saw me she say 'and PLZ...' like wan blame me for not going den suddenly remember i going home liao. den she ask 'u going home already rite?' den i say 3 den go home. she say 'oh nvm over liao.' dunno wad she wan sia. her tone of talking is like i nv do anithing liddat. wa... angry sia. today is the busiest day ever lo. she din see me around is cuz i inside cubicle doing stuff ma. as if i go tea room sleep liddat. shannaro. in the morning start sponging and making bed. after dat alice the AN went to send patient. i went to take parameter after helping alot ppl do alot of things. luan. after taking parameter i went to do dressing. den chart wound chart. also dat lecturer come and say my hair messy den also ask me pick my case study. and nag alot. nag yr 3 too.... after dressing shld be my turn to go for break liao. den got call bell. went to ans. it's not my side lo. den alice came back and ask me to do hrly parameter. so i did half of it. cuz 1 of them have many doctors around them. so cun do. den got ppl wan change diaper i go do it. also not my side. went to talk to alice abt the 1 person i haven done yet. den called by HA to change patient clothes. wa... faint. the person clothes all wet. den change liao HA see wan see got poo not. saw alot of urine. so change diaper. take halfway den saw stool. omg... so change lo. den the stool is everywhere. so we change everything... wa.... tire.... the auntie cun move at all de. after dat den i go break lo. i came back early as usual. come back do this and dat den help auntie den pass report. i din loither or slack at all. yet she still use tat kind of attitude to me. sister also treat us better den her lo. she think she own TTSH....

*i wish she get 2 weeks mc and not to see her again during my attachment. tmd*

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6:55 PM

ღ Tuesday, April 26, 2005

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today is the first time i saw a bed sore. no feelings. juz dunno how to clean it sia. realli very hard and tiring. poor yr 3 help me help till so tire too. cuz the sore is at the buttock dere ma. den have to turn him. he cannot tok cannot move. we try very very hard den turn him. but very hard to clean it. cun realli reach well. and also he has so many wounds. spend like 1 hour to do dressing. and half an hour to help yr 3 do suction. total 1hr 30mins inside. when in at 1033 come out at 1206. also we need to wear mask cuz they say infectious. but i dunno where infectious lehz. den the other AN told me cuz he always cough den got sputum come out well i also very blur la. juz noe need to wear can le. also have a very weird smell in dat room. dun wanna go in. but bo bian. T.T actually our break is at 11. but drag till 12. come out so exhausted. when to eat. come back feel so refresh. hehe. come back early as usual. den hui hui tell mi the nasty teacher we encountered on er... yesterday, ask us for meeting want us do case study. wa... i dun like her sia!! T.T actually she not dat nasty la. juz very ma fan and den super naggy onli. gosh... realli mafan. i tot she onli wan meet us nia. haha. so we went to hide. hehe. also not realli hide la. juz went to make ourselves busy. like shinta do dressing. den all of us went to observe. except hui hui. cuz cannot find her. do halfway den i went to do hrly parameter. after dat hui hi come find us. say we hai her went alone den lecturer scold. lol so bad sia us. we somehow ba kar with yr 3 de. hehe. so in the end we go lo. the lecturer nag la. but when we say we do dressing she say ok ok. she asked shinta y she 1pm start work den 1pm meeting she still can do dressing. den i say shinta reach early la. den she diam liao. haha. she hate ppl late de. den she start saying things we need to do la. blah blah blah. like mostly aim our ward liddat. say till like we so stupid liddat. no matter how farnie she can be. i see her face no mood to luff liao. zzz. alamak i dunno wan do on hu sia. sigh... today also saw ambutation de wound. so gross. i see liao feel like crying sia. dunno cuz gross or cuz i saw the difference of both leg. one intact one ambutated. alot feelings rush to me. poor thing...

sometimes i think hor. if one day i had accident. and lost my limbs or wadever dat make me cannot be a nurse animore. i dunno wad else i can do sia. begin to love nursing liao. though i dun encourage suicide. but if accident really happen to me and i cun be a nurse i will consider dat. rather den be a burden to my family rite? cuz i'm suppose to support them instead of them providing for me. my dad so old liao. juz a few more years to retiring. and my mum. she dun have ANY skills at all. except look after kids. which i think she did badly. look at those kids she taken care of. mostly shorties lai de. LOL. and she noe nth abt health. wad is good for baby. i caught her alot of time feeding my niece on the bed. means nv carry her up. how i caught her? cuz i heard my niece coughing!! and also making gagging sound. i dun wan her to choke lo. infant choke very scary de lehz. i think of the lesson we had jiu scary liao. hit them so hard. scold her alot of them liao. she nv listen.... still say my niece grown up liao. HELLO!!! she's juz 2 mths old. going 3 mths. u call dat grown up? den y still think of me as a kid?? i am already 17 years and 5 months lor. which is 204 mths. -.- come on man. listen to me. i'm a nurse to be at least rite? omg tv got i like de show gtg liao. hehe. i seriously will die if i cannot be a nurse. wad else can i do? i'm useless if i cun be a nurse. blah!

*i wish i can be a nurse till i retire and den i die at an age my parent dun need me. and my kids are independent enuff. bless me i dun wan anione to suffer* if not hor den my parent dun need me and i have no kid also can. juz spare a tot for my parents plz*

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9:34 PM

ღ Sunday, April 24, 2005

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yesterday meet lynn to give ruiting present. ruiting brought one of her fren dere too. me and lynn hor very jia lat. from meet each other which is around 1.30 talk till go home 10.30 total of 9hrs. non stop at all. like machine gun. lol. ruiting and her fren bth us. we seldom liddat de lehz. juz dat 1 week nv talk hor alot of things to say ma. hehe. talk from wad we each do in hospital to anime to wad ever we see to studies to family to cd to clothes to shoes. aiya juz anithing under the sun the moon the ceiling the rooftop the bus ceiling the mrt ceiling haha juz everything la. eat also talk play pool also talk in bus talk walk still talk. ppl shop we talk. everytime ruiting and her fren turn and look at us. we talking halfway de. hehe. i think liddat abit bad lehz. like neglect them. but i juz cun stop myself! lol. auto will talk.

hehe. we went shopping at queensway. wan call char go play pool de. but ppl 7th month lehz. dun disturb them. lol. walk for very long nv buy anithing hehe. den went to eat mac. after dat we go hougang play pool. took the wrong bus 1hr 30 mins den reach. somemore traffic jam. rui ting and her fren wan die in the bus haha. die from pek chekness. while me and lynn still happily talking. haha. finally reach den go play pool. ruiting pro liao sia. hehe. play play play den go home le. hehe not much la but we spend 1 whole day doing this 2 tings. hehe. reach home at 11.44 den play com lo. eek tml attachment again -.- haiz. nvm la. juz 2 more weeks and freedom!!! yada!

*i wish my mother faster make her decision and go cwp with me. sianz*

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1:24 PM

ღ Friday, April 22, 2005

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so my bad feelings are right. today realli is a rotten day. but my mood was so good dat i cant be bothered with it. :) cuz it's weekend!!! well today the AN is a nice one. my first day AN. and den my SN is the one dat is mix blood de. she's nice too. always luffing and smiling. but she was really very very busy. today done dressing again. wa... today keep doing wrong things. i was told to off drip. shown once by yr 3. so i tried. i forgot to stop the drip. den all the liquid flows out and wet the bad. T.T but dat was small problem. the uncle is good. he din complain. den the yr 3 teach me how to do hypocount. i was also shown once. den was asked to do. actually i dun wan to do de. so scary. but the yr3 say very easy de. she is very nice also. always give us chance to learn. but it's my mistake la. i prick too high up and cun get ani blood. think got the nail. haiyo. this uncle hor. everytime i go take his parameter he ask me i wan take blood izzit. T.T liddat i dun dare to do hypocount again la. T.T 3rd bad thing today. well morning did some sponging den went to recieve patient from OT around 8. he got a fish bone stuck in the throat. need operation. he is a nice man la. we bring oxygen cylinder to fetch him. and we brought it back. den after dat transfer him to bed i went to hang his drip (take note all frens. i can reach the drip stand k!!!-.-) den the AN took out the kidney dish and the oxygen cylinder and dunno put where. den around 11 she came to ask me did i see the cylinder. i said no. i was so puzzled lo dat time. i cun recall wad happen to the cylinder after we left him. the cylinder was said to be missing. den she went to search. after the hypocount incident she came to me again. straight after dat incident. -.- den hor she said she hand the cylinder to me. my god!! i din even touch it. my impression of it was it is too heavy for me. i din touch at all lo. she said she ask me to keep. wa... me shock till cannot speak. when did i touch sia?? den she went to ask her fren she saw the cylinder not. den they speak in their own language. den her fren ask me where i keep. oh my god. i din touch it. if she nv bring me to search i dun even know where they keep the cylinder lo. -.- den me and her went to OT to search dun have. the ppl dere like very scare we blame them liddat. keep saying they nv take they have no reason to keep wad. not they take one. all sorts of things la. den we went back to the ward. went to the place dat store the cylinder. my god... it's there lo. i told my AN maybe someone borrow nv say she dun believe sia. den at there le she den believe lo. someone went to recieve ppl also. den use our cylinder. phew. heng not lost. arbo later dunno have to pay money not. -.- rotten day ya? but it doesnt affect me at all. :) too happy to be affected. was like smiling half of my shift. one of my patient is my sec sch npcc junior de bro i think. hehe. saw her dere yesterday. den talk abit la. i din reply her actually. juz nod and smile. dunno wad to say. hehe. let me rest!!! today really very very busy. hardly got time to breathe. normally until 2 passing report i can slack around cuz next shift ppl come le. but today i cant. need to help everywhere. wa. tire.

*i wish i can rest more. and more good days coming*

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9:05 PM

ღ Thursday, April 21, 2005

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today is morning shift. heng got father drive me. so tire. onli slept 4hrs. today super nice ANs same shift as me. haiz tml not same liao sad. will be so bored and no one to help me. T.T today was a very busy busy day. doing things non stop. except b4 and after break. realli nth to do. loiter around. but well today is quite good la. feel comfortable with the place liao. ^^ but realli dun like tml lehz. got a bad feeling... not all an and sn dat nice ya. today the sn incharge was quite impatient. haiyo. in the first place dun like her liao. so bo bian lo. pray i dun get the other sn which complain we always read casenote de. she same shift with me almost everyday liao lo. sianz. dun same side can le.... i kinda like passing report. waste alot of time. but they are too quick for me le. hmmm... try my best la hor....

*i wish tml AN will be my fav one and SN be my fav one too. plz....*

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9:44 PM

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day 3: good day. good nurse. good patient. busy day tat makes the day good. :) okie today was a little action pack. my poor patient heart rate went up to 200+ give us a big shock. me and song shan fren (cun remember his name) second time we got shocked by the dinamap. the first time was bp of the patient went up to 200+/100+ very very high. super shock. i guess we 2 cannot go take parameters together. will cause disaster ya. tml is a super early morning shift. oh well... juz as i got used to afternoon shift and gotten super comfortable of it... nvm morning better. go home earlier can watch 7pm show. :) also more free time. 1-9 no free time. go home bath watch tv till fall asleep. woke up it's another day. take lunch cum breakfast. off to work. see no freedom. morning de at least can go out. if i am not dat lazy. but i am DAT lazy. sorry. hehe. today learn some new things dat we are not taught b4. the staff there like to ask me do things i nv done b4. or learn but nv do b4 on real person. so the scary sia. ngt feeding i was told to do but i ran away. hehe. bo eng. dressing i done. did some mistake. scared till stomache. nervous sia. and den off plug. change iv drip. how i noe the drip/min? aiyoz. i ask super lots of qn. think all the staff dere got fed up by me. every little thing i ask. but there's 2 very very very nice AN on my shift. friendly till unbelievable. the SN look fierce but was so willing to help me. juz dat she was busy doing the poor uncle ecg la. oh ya i even help ecg. pressurized sia. y nv ask hui hui help? too much things 1 day will scare me de... day 2 was so slack nth to do. like modeling liddat. catwalk here and dere. got 1 SN like to 'supervise' we student nurse. she like dun wan to see us doing nothing when there realli is nothing left to do lo. we read casenotes she ask our senior yr 1 come here whole day read case note ah? me 0.0 lo. we did so much she din see. nth to do read den she saw. nvm la. she also dun really dare to say out loud. juz use eyes follow us. i also dun wan nth to do de ma. how i wish we can be as busy as bee. but heck no.... nvm la...

*i wish tml i wun be very tired. so late now!!!*

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1:26 AM

ღ Monday, April 18, 2005

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the day i dread the most came. and i realise things aint so bad. at least for today. hope tml will be the same. becuz today got 4 yr 1. and tml got 2 onli. and tml dun have the kind and pretty yr 3 students. there is but not the one i am used to today. and also wonder i will get which staff nurses and sister tml. i like the one i have today. AND tml shift is 1-9. dun like dat. i prefer m0rning de... the onli thing i look forward will be my dad driving me home barhz. hur hur.

realise i feel most happy in ttsh. my fren all had complains. i dun. cuz this is way better den amkh. and also have aircon. hehe. the staff are alot friendlier. even the relatives. it's true dat we have nothing to do. but at least i did more den wad i done in amkh. and also we got a real nice lecturer. ^^ helped us a ton.

one thing i always believe. the higher ur expectation the greater disappointment u will get. maybe i din expect anithing nice so it turn out to be good. now i expect it to be good. it may go below average. so wad shld i expect?? my shift diff from jean and wina. onli same as hui hui. and also i will eat alone. cuz all break diff. T.T where are my frens? dun even get to eat with a student nurse i dunno. juz alone. i'm afraid doing hands on. meaning serving medi and dressing. very very scare. scare do wrong. i need guidance!! oh ya lynn if u happen to see this i need to say good luck to u. dat ger happen to be the most kiasu among the 3 of them. jia you gers!!! hope all of u get through it safely and quickly. pray dat time flies~

so tire. fall asleep doing everything. fall asleep bathing. fall asleep watching tv. oh god. i'm old.

*i wish tml will be a better day*

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10:01 PM

ღ Sunday, April 17, 2005

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finally get rid of the attachment phobia liao. phew. juz try to learn as much as possible barhz... hmm... but 2 mths i will miss my classmates alot de. esp lynn, charlene and von. they diff hosp as me. haiyo. hope time flies. still got alot of things haven prepare... tml den buy... holiday i will wait for u! :) freedom i am waiting for u too. :) plz come to me.

*i wish times flies during attachment and stop during vacation*

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7:19 PM

ღ Saturday, April 16, 2005

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finally exam over. but how i wish it nv will be over... haiz. really no feeling for attachment. maybe cuz i haven had my vacation yet. i noe me very playful but i juz cun help it. i wanna play... where's my freedom? sad...

*i wish life can be not so depressing*

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12:29 AM

ღ Friday, April 08, 2005

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it's going to be a super long entry. is abt my dream last night. this is the clearest dream ever. and i can remember till now. ^^ involves alot of ppl...

at first, there's me and my da sao at liang jing ru concert. but it's more like auto sess. supposingly my bro should be there. but din see him around. juz know he came with us. my da sao was eating. while i sing along and take pic. there's 2 special guest. mayday and i forget hu. chou hua jian ba. i keep taking mayday pic. for ziqing. den i saw a guy i dun like standing infront. i went to the front to see jing ru better. den saw him. he is the super kiasu plus old de fan of all female singer. (real life really liddat. eek)

Scene 2
suddenly it became yanqin's house. mayday also there. my da sao and bro gone. dunno y. dream ma... at her house we saw te newspaper about a dog that is very very huge and it only walk on 2 legs like a human. and is wearing those bathing robe. (it's a male so i say he. it very weird) he is taller than those american. super super tall. he ate somebody or break someone's limbs i think nv see in detail. den i went outside cuz i wan buy mayday cd. last time de. then i found out i forget to bring money. so i went to the balcony and shout for yanqin her hse 2nd level. she and mayday stood there and look at me. den she threw me 10 $2 notes. at first i dun believe her den i go and count. den found out she nv cheat me. haha. she din say anithing that's y it's weird. den i ask her where can i buy the cd. before she answer me, an old lady came to ask me direction. to some shop i think. she spoke to me in chinese. i told her i dunno. cuz it's not my hse. so i ask her to ask yq. she spoke to yq in english. i dunno y sia... yq not high class?? yq ans halfway den she lean too much den fall from her balcony. omg scare me sia. she's alright of cuz. and we joke dat i cant make it in time to shoot it using my phone. den off we went to buy.

we joke and walk den suddenly saw dat huge dog lying on the beach sleeping with his puppy. his puppy is the size of a normal adult dog. so huge. his eye is cover with notes. american notes. think 1000 cuz is big enuff to cover his face. and there's extra at the side. yq and me ran immediately. cuz everyone do so. but clumsy me step on the side of the notes covering his eye. wa... me scare till wan cry den faster run. run double the speed juz now. as i run i turn and look. den saw him climbing up slow motion. den when i turn again he is like only 3m away from us. i dont even have the time to scream juuz keep on running. dunno y the person beside me became a guy i nv see b4 but in the dream he is my bro. we juz run hand in hand. where did yq go? i dunno... juz turn into this guy. there a sis too. (i nv had one...) she's super pretty and cute de. she dunno run until where. so me and my bro keep running. (i'm youngest btw in the dream) the dog keep catching up to us. i told my bro we should get to the swimming pool. i assume dog swim slow. who knows this super dog swim as fast as me. and my bro swim really super slow. the dog can catch my bro. i panic wan to reach my bro den i dive up and flew in the sky (swimming style) i still wonder in the dream y lynn cun fly. hehe. after dat i drag my bro up. i try to negoiate with the dog. i say we should go sea to compete. cuz i assume he cant see in the sea... i said if he caught us there means he is the strongest. den after some consideration he agreed. and brought us to a weird hse. it's his owner hse. we met our sis there.

the sea there is so filled with fishes dat we can see their head on the surface. the owner of the dog make me and my sis wear a weird shoe like boots de and a weird stocking (?) to prevent something i dun understand. cuz dat time i turned into a small ger. like pri sch liddat. the dog became very calm. not aggressive liao. he taught my sis how to get to the destination cuz we are suppose to pinic there (?) he need to bring me and my bro dere. he held our hand. the owner told us proudly that the dog can swim to the other island without coming up for air and can reach by 1hr. den me and my bro gave up winning him liao. so we juz follow where he bring us lo. he talk to me in a way ppl talk to kid. he told me soon we will see the rock monster dat we saw in story books. juz when he finish saying the rock monster appear. den there's 1 hole with fire in it. we went inside a place like a cave liddat (in the middle of the sea?) the dog threw a thing dat look like hand into the fire. den the rock monster shut up. (making alot of noise) den the dog turned into a hamster dat is around my height and i became my age again. i figure he threw a hand and becuz he need to feed the rock monster he appear in the newspaper. kinda pity him. the cave looks like hell. very very eerie.

alot of ppl there. machiam tour liddat. like the haw par villa liddat. the dog (hamster?) left us with the person making a speech. the person say soon we will be able to feel the touch of ghost. den i felt someone touching my hip. i refuse to turn around. cuz i'm scare to see wad is it. (i'm so cowardly in the dream... -.-) but the ghost refuse to give up. keep tapping and tapping. i bth den turn around. i said 'ya i feel it already ok??' den quickly turn around. the guy is wearing a tradition chinese wedding clothes. those red de. he den forcely turned me to face him. den he held my hand. his hand is surprisingly warm almost to hot dat kind. den suddenly he hug me. wa... me scare till nv move. thanks godness i saw the dog. i quickly ran to him and hug him. he asked me whether i wan to stay in this place or move on? i asked him where is my sis and bro. he dun wan to ans me. he say i must make my decision first. of cuz i choose to move on. too eerie. we move on to another room. i saw my bro den ran to him. he told me his ghost was a old ah pek. den he scold the ghost siao. (?) den he told me all the ghost are fake. my sis went to act one too. -.- and if i chose to stay there something bad will happen. heng... den i found out the ghost hand so warm becuz he had a basin of fire near his leg. -___- before i told dat ghost anithing i wake up already. by my brother. haha. weird dream rite?

tml me bro going army le. dun feel sad at all. but he super sad. today keep moaning act weeping den keep telling us he dun wanna go... -_________-

*i wish he dun suffer much there and tml exam gimme good grade plz....*

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2:39 AM

ღ Sunday, April 03, 2005

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I dun wanna study for exam!
I dun wanna go attachment!!
I dun wanna throw tantrum!
I dun wanna waste my time!
I dun wanna go to sch ahhh!!

hell... i'm bored... -.-

i dun wanna study yet i wan good result.
i dun wanna go attachment yet i wan to graduate.
i dun wanna throw tantrum yet i wan to let out my frustration.
i dun wanna waste my time yet i wan to blog now.
i dun wanna go sch yet i wan to see my fren.
and my new found goal is to go U and take a degree.
it's isnt good to have 2 useless kid rite?
i must think for my dad.
i will do my best and let him be proud of me.
but... i dun have the strength and determination to do so.
anibody wanna give me motivation?

AND!!! i wanna mute my aunt!!!
she's the root of my headaches recently.
cun she juz shut up and let me do wad i wan?
come on man my parents dun even say anithing.
hell... stop nagging at me!!!
damn irritating!!
see now still nagging.
wth... so much time den go to sleep more la.
later tml complain again.
bad mouth woman!

i love my mummy.
she's so cute.
and she loves me too.
sorry that i hurt her.

*i wish wishes are grantable. if they are... i wanna go U give me motivation plz. and make dat woman stop nagging at me*

the com will soon become mine in... 5 days.
haiz... i need to study for exam and then attachment.
when can i really make full use of it?
craving for my own room.
so tat i can read myself to sleep.
sing myself to sleep and listen to songs and fall asleep.
this wish can nv be granted so y should i wish?
argh... hope i can sleep forever and all trouble gone.

~{SHANNARO!!}~ *inner engsin*

♥ Done Shopping @

3:25 AM